Patient: Doctor Doctor! I've a strawberry stuck in my ear!

Doctor: Don't worry, I think I've some cream for that!

Patient: Doctor Doctor! I think I'm a pair of curtains!

Doctor: Pull yourself together!

Patient: Doctor Doctor! I think I'm going to die in 59 seconds!

Doctor: Hold on! I'll see you in a minute!

Patient: Doctor Doctor! Will I be able to play the piano when you've fixed my hand?
Doctor: Of course!

Patient: Great! I've never been able to play before!

Patient: Doctor Doctor! I think I need glasses!

Waiter: You certainly do - this is a restaurant!

Patient: Doctor Doctor! I keep thinking I'm a cowboy. How long will this last?

Doctor: Usually only about a yeeehhhaaaaa!

Patient: Doctor Doctor! I think I'm addicted to butter?

Doctor: Hmmm, this seems to be spreading!

Patient: Doctor Doctor! My hair keeps falling out. Can you give me something to keep it in ?

Certainly! How about this paper bag?

What's orange, jumps up and down and smells of carrot?

A sick rabbit!

Patient: Doctor Doctor! I keep thinking I'm a bank note!

Doctor: Come back tomorrow and I'll see if there's any change!

Patient: Doctor Doctor! I feel like a pack of cards!

Doctor: Well sit down and I'll deal with you later!

Patient: Doctor Doctor! I think I'm a needle!

Doctor: Yes, I can see your point!

Patient: Doctor Doctor! I feel like a bell!

Doctor: Don't worry! Try this medicine and if it dosen't work then give me a ring!!

Patient: Doctor Doctor! I feel like a pony!

Doctor: That's OK! You're just a little hoarse!

What does an injured lemon need?

Lemon aid!!!

A man needed to go to the dentist. What time did he go?

Tooth hurty!!

Why did the kangaroo go to the hospital?

Because he had to have a hoparation!

What do you give a sick pig?

Some oink-ment!

Where do sick wasps go?

To the waspital!

Why did the bee go to the doctor?

Because he had hives!

Patient: Doctor Doctor! I don't feel so good! I've just eaten a red ball, a blue ball and a yellow ball!

Doctor: No wonder you aren't feeling well. You haven't been eating enough greens!

Patient: Doctor Doctor! I think I'm losing my memory.
Doctor: When did it start?

Patient: When did what start?

Patient: Doctor Doctor! I think I'm a bridge!
Doctor: What's come over you?

Patient: Two cars, a truck and a bicycle!!!

Patient: Doctor Doctor! I feel like everyone is ignoring me...

Doctor: Next!